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Why are there no werewolves among us?

Updated: Mar 6

Rydzyna, spring 2002

- Professor, why are there no werewolves among us?

Professor Rozbicki fell into a pensive mood. A deep crease crossed his forehead, as always when he thought about something deeply. Those of the students who had known him longer knew that he was now weighing the arguments, considering whether his students were ready to accept the knowledge he was supposed to pass on to them. Finally, he made a decision. He straightened up behind the cathedral and look at the supernaturals staring at him.

- Werewolves - he said thoughtfully as if still searching for the right words - are, in a sense, victims of their animal nature. Because their character is not very wolfy, but rather ... doggy. They are too easy to train and condition, especially if raised from puppyhood. It's all too easy to instill an ideology in them and steer them to serve who they consider their master - and his interests. They served thoughtlessly, without asking any questions, and faithfully. Till death. And the building in which we are located is the best witness to such training.

Rozbicki stopped and walked over to the desk, followed by the eyes of fifteen students eager for more stories. He took a beautifully carved pipe from a drawer and began to carefully fill it with black Turkish tobacco, the aroma of which immediately spread throughout the room.


- This school - he goes on, continuing to pound the tobacco in the great briar bowl - our pride and glory, was less than sixty years ago the largest kennel of European werewolves. The mages of Ultima Thule and their human assistants trained them for one purpose - to bring destruction and terror to the known world. For people, it was just another Hitlerjugend school, but we knew the truth. Thule brought young werewolves here from all over conquered Europe and trained them in absolute obedience to their warped ideas. It trained so effectively that they remained faithful to them even after the fall of the Third Reich. If you know history, you know that the remnants of the Nazi troops operating behind the front lines were referred to as Werwolf. Not without reason. I myself participated in the hunt for the last Thule werewolves, back in the fifties. You don't know what a pack of angry, indoctrinated lycanthropes can do to a human village. I know. And I will never forget it.

The professor paused again and looked at the smoke detector on the ceiling. Then, holding the pipe in his left hand, he made an elaborate gesture with his right and whisper a few powerful words. The students watched carefully. They've been trying to learn this spell to temporarily disable the smoke detectors for several months - so far without success. Rozbicki put a match to the tobacco and carefully sucked on the mouthpiece of the pipe for a few moments until aromatic gray smoke appeared above the bowl. He puffed a few times and released a perfect, beautiful circle. The students were well acquainted with this habit of their favorite professor. They talked about it with a smile: "Rozbicki makes Gandalf." The professor, meanwhile, looked again at the classroom, now somewhat hidden by a wisp of pipe smoke, and continued:

- The sad and tragic truth is that there are no werewolves among you, because there are none at all. Well, in Europe anyway. After the war, the Society hunted them fiercely, often killing them first and checking later to see if they were related to Thule. Those that survived, guilty or not, preferred to escape to Asia or the Americas rather than be killed by the ruthless Defenders. Today, of course, this hatred of lycanthropes has subsided, but they still rarely visit Europe - and I'm not surprised at all.

Rozbicki "made Gandalf" again and put his pipe on the cathedral.

- But we're chit-chatting here, you draw me into sentimental stories about the past, and exams are around the corner, there's no point in wasting precious time! He silenced the moans of protest with a gesture. - Mrs. Walicka, please describe to me three ways of apparent change of lead into gold and one way of real change. It could be on a practice test! Don't forget why you're here!


written by Tomasz Lewandowski, translation by Paulina Mech

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